“This Is The End Of The Line”
The oncologist’s words hit me like 2 barrels of a shotgun fired one after the other as he relayed the results of my latest CT scan. His face told the story I didn’t want to hear.
Was this really it for me?
Not only were the tumours in my brain and lungs not shrinking, they were growing. The radiation had not been successful in halting the growths in my brain. Even the ‘wonder drug’ Dabrafenib which, until now, had been causing the lung tumours to shrink had lost its effectiveness leaving them to now grow back. Because of this, the drug company that had been providing me the drug on compassionate use trial would be withdrawing its consent for me to use the drug. Further brain radiation was also ruled out as it was considered to be of little benefit compared to the negative side effects associated with secondary brain radiation. The only thing they could do for me was help manage my symptoms and refer me to Hospice’s palliative care team.
I sat in the car in the parking lot outside the hospital in shock at what I had just heard. The medical profession had effectively written my situation off as a hopeless case. They had no answers apart from keeping me comfortable for the rest of my days, however short or long they might be.
But my God is a God of miracles*. When all hope seems lost, He is the God of hope**. When our future seems bleak, He is the God of promise***.
Throughout my journey with cancer, I have believed that God will heal me from cancer and that I will live out many more years than stage 4 melanoma patients generally get to enjoy. My stance has not changed one bit; the only difference is now I know that my healing will be a miracle as the medical profession cannot offer me any more ‘wonder drugs’ that might be able to fix things.
We have been incredibly impacted by all the support we have received over the last 2 years since I was first diagnosed with melanoma. Many people have helped us out with our physical needs like cooking meals and looking after our kids which we are grateful for. But at this stage, the thing we want most from people is for them to stand up and believe in faith that God will deliver me from the evil of cancer.
The apparent hopelessness of the situation forces us to hold on to God’s promises to us. God has promised us all many things, good health being one of them****. We have to choose whether or not to believe God and to put our trust in Him. This is not a blind, head-in-the-sand kind of trust. It’s a ‘I’m going to lay down a challenge for my God to answer’ kind of trust that believes that God is faithful and will deliver me from my enemy (cancer)*****.
Now is not the time to allow fear in the door. Now is the time to put God’s word to the test. I have no choice but to believe God when He says “I am the Lord who heals you” (Exodus 15:26).
My life depends on it.
Blessings,
David
*’Your ways, God, are holy. What god is as great as our God? You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples.’ (Psalms 77:13-14)
**’Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken.’ (Psalms 62:5-6)
***’For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.’ (Jeremiah 29:11)
****’Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and shun evil.This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones.’ (Proverbs 3:7-8)
*****”If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling,no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent.For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways;they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.You will tread on the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent.“Because he loves me,” says the Lord, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him.With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.” (Psalms 91:9-16)
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